IT'S BEEN WAY TOO LONG! OVER A MONTH IN FACT!

Friday 11 January 2020 Time flys when you're having fun - so they say - however, time just seems to fly for me. I can't believe it has been over a month since I last blogged ... yet here we are almost midway through January. Our three-day city break with Leeanne & Caiti was much needed .... we visited the Gingerbread Exhibition, Melbourne and surrounds all made with gingerbread so you can imagine the aroma, yes it was a little hard not to eat some! We enjoyed some great food ... dinner at Maccaroni (Italian) in Manchester Lane, which is next door to Breakfree on Collins where we stayed - if you're looking for accommodation in Melbourne CBD this is a comfortable, clean and reasonably priced hotel also recommend Cafe Issus 8 Centre Place (just down from Breakfree on Collins) the food and service were first class - I'm a little fussy, odd, weird call it what you like but I only eat eggs at home and then only scrambled or in an omelette and am often made to feel 'different' when ordering breakfast/brunch, but not here my tomatoes and bacon on toast was scrumptious with the tomatoes cooked not just warmed - perfection! and the raspberry hot chocolate was heaven. Cafe Issus also has a 'pay it forward' where you can donate a meal for someone homeless. Bill had his half-yearly check-up at Peter Mac, I shudder every time the camera is put down his nose and throat, brings back memories of a traumatic time for me back in 1972, once again he got the all-clear from his surgeon Jessica. Next visit in June. Dylan landed a contract working during his Uni break checking and packing IT systems for the Queensland Electoral Commission and told us he wouldn't be able to make it home for Christmas - I was worried about him having Christmas on his own, no Christmas dinner but he assured me he could go to his mates family if he wished .. so can you imagine the delight, the screams, the tears, the laughter and joy when he walked in unannounced on Christmas day .. he flew into Melbourne at 1.20 am and Jack had driven down to pick him up (a three hour trip from here - six hours driving now that is brotherly love) ... certainly made it a Christmas to remember ... he later told me he felt bad lying to me! New Year's Eve came and went with little fanfare - too old now to party and no fireworks locally due to the bushfire situation. Sale has had several days where we have been shrouded in a blanket of smoke from the bushfires, which have been devastating with Mallacoota holidaymakers and residents sheltering on the beach and needing to be rescued by the defence force boats and helicopters ... fires like this have never been experienced in Australia before, some firefighters saying the air was on fire, not just here in Victoria, but NSW, SA and King Island ... yet our Prime Minister still denies climate change. Millions upon millions of dollars have been donated to relief funds, our sports stars, overseas celebrities have donated millions, I'd like to see some of it go towards the purchase of new, better equipment, water bombers and firetrucks and name them after them .. I can just see a bright red shiny firetruck named Demon (Alex DeMinaur) a water bomber named Thor (Chris Hemsworth) maybe even a Pink fire truck ... just my thoughts. We marked Heathers' 53rd birthday with a couple of family dinners ... Wednesday marked 11 years since Mum left us. Wondered why one of my indoor plants was looking very ill .. didn't feel like it was over or under watered ... then I discovered the reason - one Grandson and one Granddaughter decided it would be fun to hide some of the salt rocks off my lamp (yes I did think there were some missing but wasn't sure) in the pot plant - would have been OK if they hadn't put one on the soil ... mostly the pranks they pull don't have a serious consequence - I've found my cutlery drawer rearranged, the labels on the four-panel light switch changed around, sweet bowl in the Christmas tree just to name a few ... just don't let on how much it amuses me! So I've done a month on Femara now ... side effects ... not sure ... hot flushes and night sweats are they medication or weather or sinus infection (from the smoke) only time will tell I guess, am I just lucky I get a second go at menopause!! Cannot speak highly enough of the work of the McGrath Foundation Breast Cancer Nurses, mine rang on Tuesday to check on how I was progressing and honestly I'm just so so lucky that nothing has really changed in my life, I'm back using the treadmill and once the hydro pool is back in operation (asbestos discovered so undergoing major works at Aqua Energy) I'll be up there exercising. Life is for living ... and that's what I intend to do.

RADIATION - DONE AND DUSTED!

OMG ... two full weeks have passed since my last blog - and full and memorable weeks they have been. Since then I've completed radiation therapy - with nothing more than an itchy rash. I found the tiny icepack I'd been given after the lumpectomy and that combined with the cold Aqueous cream (keep in fridge Sally the breast cancer nurse told me) give great relief - five days on its gradually subsiding. I've been truly blessed with having an amazing support team in my family and friends, they've been my chauffers, laughed with me, shed a tear or two with me, 'shouted' me meals and given up three hours of their day for me (travel to Traralgon in 45 mins each way plus treatment time). On Monday, December 2 when Lindie & I walked into the radiotherapy department we were 'blown away' by the transformation over the weekend - a forest of Christmas Trees - each one decorated with a different 'theme', brick walls, a fireplace and a wooden Christmas tree with an array of homebaked Christmas treats packaged in cellophane for patients and their supports to enjoy .... and enjoy we did! my favourite was the tiny mince pies - similar size to what Mumma used to bake - I'm not a fan of the supermarket variety, find they are too big and have too much pastry for my liking. One of the staff members in IT makes the decorations and did the decorating over the weekend and I trust she was able to witness the appreciation of those of us undergoing treatment. Lindie has offered to assist next Christmas - I would too but compared to Lindie my decorations are very amateurish! I saw a psychologist ... however in the time between getting my referral and an appointment I'd had a huge meltdown - I won't go into details but to say to it involved silverbeet - silverbeet which became very finely shredded - after which I physically felt like a weight had lifted from my heart and shoulders. Deb put it down to grief and the fact I'm a carer and a supporter and forget to look out for me ... to help me overcome the overwhelming teary times (simple things like medical staff asking me to confirm my name set me off which then meant I needed to explain I wasn't scared just grieving) she suggested to think of silverbeet as a trigger word which will make me smile. Deb believes I understand and have control of my mental wellbeing, that I just needed to have it confirmed and talk with someone independent .. so no further visits required. Grief affects us all in different ways ... and you don't grieve if you haven't loved! Just don't put off seeking help if you feel you need it ... unfortunately there is still some stigma out there regarding mental health ... A friend of Lyns' gave her a copy of The Beacon (Breast Cancer Network magazine) for me to read and in there I found an interesting letter from a reader which said "don't say to recently diagnosed family/friend 'call me if you need anything' instead 'take the bull by the horns' and do something (make a meal, organise to go with them to appointments, take them shopping or for a coffee, contact them instead) as for most it's hard to ask for help even though it's been offered. And for those like me who do find it hard to ask for help ... people really don't offer if they don't mean it Leeanne and Caiti are holidaying with us for ten days, the past few years we have had an early Christmas with our Queensland family which unfortunately this year we couldn't manage, hence they have come to us. Tomorrow we are off to Melbourne for two nights before they fly home on Wednesday. Bill has his half-yearly check-up at Peter Mac on Tuesday - then its shopping and Christmas lights and decorations. It will be a lovely break to celebrate the conclusion of radiation. After three months of trying and numerous treatments, my nails were still flaking and breaking so with a little gentle persuasion from Caiti I now have some new acrylic Christmas themed nails ... silly but true they are a big morale booster! Started taking Femara on Wednesday - so a little early yet for any side effects, but hey I'm not going to get any! Posted off a few Christmas cards, mainly to those who are not on Facebook and that we don't see regularly ... and yes the first few cards we received were ones I'd missed ... oops My beautiful sister-in-law and niece had a lovely mother/daughter trip to Uluru - I could hear the joy in her voice yesterday when she rang - Christmas won't be easy for her this year. Each year my tradition is to watch Carols by Candlelight on Christmas Eve by the light of three special candles (Dad, Molly and Mum) this year we add another two for Pete and Robyn. Carols by Candlelight has been part of my Christmas since a little girl, I remember Mum purchasing a Carols book at the Newsagents and we would sit around the radio listening and singing ... then came TV and we could watch this amazing spectacle. Attending a Carols by Candlelight is on my "Wish List' and Robyn and I had been planning on going in 2020. One of Bill & my favourite Christmas eve memories is Mum singing along to a Carol being sung in Latin - after all those years Mum still remembered Latin from her highschool days. Finally some more warm weather predicted for the coming week ... bring on those lazy hazy days of Summer.

HALF WAY ....

Sunday 1 December 2020 First day of summer and the forecast isn't looking at all like producing the typical warm sunny summer day we Aussies love - cloudy, windy and showers with a top temperature of 18c and we have a scheduled power outage from 8.30 -4.00 - first thoughts were a trip to Lakes Entrance and enjoy fish, chips and scallops on the foreshore but Mother Nature said not really a good idea, next idea movies and shopping at Midvalley Morwell however my body (and mind) is telling me different - there's a lot of things on my 'To Do' list that can be done without power and Sale has a cinema (albeit old and in need of a good revamp) and shops. Half way through radiation treatment ... so far all going well - have had a late afternoon 'nanna nap' - unscheduled whilst watching the cricket! -the past two afternoons so maybe fatigue is starting to creep in, but no signs of burning or blistering. The time travelling to and from Traralgon gives great opportunity for some precious 'one on one' time that is often hard to find these days - Monday Heather & I had some Mummy/Daughter time - morning tea, shopping and lunch, Spotlight was on the agenda Tuesday with Lindie, lots of laughs with Shell on Wednesday, my long time friend (actually the first friend I made when we moved to Sale in 1970) Noelene was my 'support' on Thursday and Friday, usually when we meet up we chat about whats happening currently so it was lovely to look back on times gone by and remember those early days when our kids were babies, velvet soap and shining kitchen sinks and lots of other wonderful memories. Lunched at Eviva in Traralgon Plaza on Thursday - good food but busy and noisy. Friday Noelene had booked for lunch at Victoria Rose Teahouse in Rosedale as a special treat - we shared a Ploughmans lunch followed by heavenly lemon meringue cheesecake sitting by the open window with the scent of roses wafting in was so peaceful. I am blessed with some wonderful friends. Tuesday I saw Dr Joshi my medical oncologist regarding stage 3 of my treatment, once radiation has finished I'll take Femara for 5 years ... not jumping for joy at this however if it is going to help prevent the recurrence of cancer and prolong my life 'so be it' ... some of the known side effects are just what I don't need: weight gain, fatigue, aching muscles and emotional swings .... WOO HOO ... I can gain weight quite easily now, my emotions are still understandably up and down at the moment without medication! Dr Joshi ordered a bone density scan for comparison annually as Femara has been known in some cases to cause brittle bones. Positive thinking, meditation, exercise, fresh air and healthy eating = my plan of attack against this little yellow tablet! Bodhi & Lulu turned four on Wednesday - the past two years we have been up North on holidays and there to celebrate with them (and twice cancer has kept us from being there, first Bill now me) yesterday they 'face timed' us to say thank you for their birthday cards and gifts - sometimes you just have to love modern technology. Had a long phone call from Dylan on Friday night - once again I'm a very proud Grandma, his exam results were exceptional again top score is 7 and he achieved 7 in three subjects and 6 in his fourth which should almost guarantee him a scholarship towards his study exchange in South Korea next year. I've been a Western Bulldogs member for over 15 years now (a fan for way way way longer) just a three game membership, more just financial support for the Club I love, With this years automatic membership renewal an email was sent out with a 'scratch and win' feature as a thank you for continued support .... I won a membership upgrade ... General admission to all home and away games .... happy me, hopefully I'll get to a lot more games next season. Our lovely Sri Lankan neighbours who are employed at a local market garden keep us supplied with fresh green vegetables, lettuce, cauliflowers, broccoli, cabbage for which we are so grateful as are the family members and their friends we share the produce with ... cooked up a few dishes yesterday to fill the freezer for dinners later in the week ... one huge cabbage, doubt I've ever seen one so big, obviously too big for the supermarkets, only used half yesterday in making Chow Mein and coleslaw - another batch of Chow Mein coming up this evening (when the powers back). Heather was a happy little vegemite as I cooked up a couple of extra meals for her and Matt. On Friday my Brother Peter was remembered at the Ecumenical Service hosted at St Stephen's Cathedral Brisbane by the Asbestos Disease Support Society. It is asbestos awareness week - please be careful of asbestos. 55 butterflies representing the 55 people who have lost their lives including Pete were placed on a canvas - I wish I could have shared the photo with you however they have a copyright on them. Sadly 4000 have died nationally this year. Till next time ...

LOVE, SUPPORT, FRIENDSHIP AND KINDNESS ...

Sunday 24 November 2019 I'm not sure where time disappears to … each day just seems to meld into the next lately. A few blogs ago I mentioned how the Sale Cancer Support Group was invited to participate in a series of short videos titled Gathering of Kindness .. these videos are now on You Tube, if you have a few spare minutes you might like to watch a few of these real life stories November seems to have been a month of changing temperatures and strong winds, very little rain and thankfully no bushfires. Air-conditioner was going full blast on the trip to Traralgon (and home) … stopped of at Del Jardine in Rosedale and purchased my purple pot to plant Robyns daffodils in - amazed how affordable the pots, plants and giftware there is (shall go back one day without Bill so I can really have a good browse) - loved the lifesize cow and the larger than life Panda in the plant section - worth a visit just to see The radiation process was a lot quicker today and we didn't upset Brenda who treated me to a hot chocolate and Bill a Brazilian coffee (no cheap instant stuff for us!). Once back in Sale a quick dash into Queen of All Things to purchase a Funky Monkey Deo Ball (a clear crystal 100% pure and natural Himalayan organic mineral salt deodorant) Jenn (French) has an amazing array of 'stuff' as her business name suggests she really is Queen of All Things plus the other side of her business is Jenn French Massage and Wellbeing Centre Thanks Jenn - deodorant works a treat. No school for my Princess on Friday which meant by driving to Traralgon she was able to add another hour to her My Learners tally - we left Lilly at Stockland to shop whilst we travelled on to LVCH for my radiation - what a hoot! my radiotherapists we Sumtpa an Australian born Sri Lanken and Widith who was born in Mauritius, these two guys had me laughing with their banter. Went to The Wedge for the Taylor Henderson concert with Noelene - Taylor has a great voice and his showmanship and rapport with the audience made for a really entertaining evening. Pride of place in the lounge is the Christmas Tree … took me 5 hours to decorate (because I'm a perfectionist!!) but I'm happy with it, just need a couple more little trinkets which I'll pick up tomorrow …. H is rostered to take me to be zapped tomorrow and we're having a Mummy/daughter lunch and shopping day afterwards - watch out KMart! Started to wrap a few of the Christmas Gifts I've managed to cross off my list so far - but once again got distracted - cricket! Aussie Aussie Aussie Oops hope Bills not too hungry yet … forgot the time - luckily I've most of dinner prepared.

ONE DOWN - FOURTEEN TO GO ....

Yesterday was day one of my radiation schedule …. I feel I've prepared myself as best as I can for this experience … I've read My Journey, asked questions of my medical/radiation team and yes I did Google some too! The best laid plans sometimes never come off and unfortunately Heather wasn't able to get the day off work and all other family and friends were unavailable, so Bill and I set off - I was confident that any fatigue I may experience won't happen until mid next week at the earliest - stopping at Clarke Rubber to purchase the weather strip for the lounge window, we arrived at LVCH half an hour early and managed to obtain a disabled park (Bill has a sticker which we seldom use) in the top car park. By now I was 'hanging' for a coffee, we headed to the café and decided to take advantage of the tranquil comfy radiation centre waiting room and consume it …. oops we upset Brenda (not really she was just pretending) as its her job to provide us with coffee and biscuits. Hannah is my radiation assistant this week and after weighing in (I like my weight better when I'm not fully clothed and with shoes on) I'm shown a row of four cupboards each one bearing an Australian native animal sticker - my gown is on a shelf (complete with my name) in the Ringtail Possum cupboard. After donning this beautiful designer gown, which just meets in the middle but hey I've flashed my boob at so many people the past two months what's a couple more! its off to the radiation 'bunker' I'm introduced to the team in the viewing room who all smile and assure me they will be watching me and can hear me should the need arise that I get traumatised or overcome - which is comforting to know. Off with the gown, hide behind the green modesty sheet and up onto the bed, feet into their correct position - somethings wrong my heads not reaching my 'mould', have I shrunk this past week (wouldn't mind if it was girth not height) nah just needed a minor adjustment on the bed and voila all is good, I lie there looking at the palm trees complete with coconuts on the ceiling whilst Hannah and Sumpta (I think that is the lovely young mans name) ensure that all the measurements are correct and that I'll be zapped in the right spots … then I'm alone in the room with the machine, I lie there silly thoughts going through my head 'glad those trees aren't real, don't want a coconut landing on me' suddenly I'm aware of someone re entering the room and Sumpta is there, handing me the rope to pull myself up and handing me the green modesty sheet once again, I head over to the chair with my basket containing my clothes and as I don my blue gown and wander back to the change room to get dressed, fold up my blue gown and put back into the possum cupboard for tomorrow. Tomorrow will be even quicker I'm told. After a quick interview with Jenny, one of the nurses who gives me a tube of cream and an instruction sheet, answers the couple of questions I have, suggests that I should have a driver each day as fatigue can set in at anytime and without warning - its time to head home. Lyn calls in just after we arrived home - she has a terrible cold and won't come inside so we chat through the security door and arrange some dates she will drive me to Traralgon. Shell rings to see how today went and find out my future appointment times - we work out a couple of dates she is able to take me and tells me to ask Rob to take me somedays, which I've been loathe to do, I know he's my son and he wants to support me but he has a business to run and now is his busy busy time as the grass just keeps growing fast and his clients like their lawns pristine. I take her advice and yep he's happy to do at least one day. Heather calls in on her way home from work - suggests the days she will try to get off to take me. Oh how much simpler it would be if we had Radiology here in Sale as well as Oncology …. maybe one day …. whilst its only a 45 minute drive to Traralgon the return trip takes at least two hours out of your day. Time to get ready for day two.

ARE YOU OK? .... WELL NO - NOT REALLY ...

Sunday 17 November Spring is drawing closer to summer - the days are getting warmer - that's what should happen but here in Gippsland its still been cold and windy. Appointments last Monday with my GP followed by Radiation CT scan and planning so we made it a day out .. I needed a referral signed to take with me to Gippsland Cancer Centre and I've been struggling emotionally the past week or so - I feel I've coped with losing Pete as I'd known for the past 6 years he was on 'borrowed' time but losing Robyn seemed so sudden even though I knew her prognosis was terminal - so I put my 'big girl pants on' and asked for an appointment with a counsellor plus a referral for oncology rehab exercise and a dietician to help me lose some weight. Admitting we are struggling mentally isn't easy to do and I admire those in public life who have come forward recently and sought 'time out' and help. Next stop Rosedale to pick out a purple pot ready to plant the daffodils from Robyns garden, alas the pot place only opens Thursday to Sunday, oh well just have to stop there another time. Onto Clarke Rubber, wasn't quite sure what we needed, served by a most obliging young man Aaron who gave us a sample piece to bring home and try - just what we need so will stop off on our next trip to Traralgon. On to Morwell where I had to return a couple of items I'd purchased on-line but didn't like before a well earned morning tea at Donut King where Shay another delightful young person served us, good customer service with a smile makes such a difference. After a quick walk round Big W it was back to Traralgon, enjoyed a cup of coffee courtesy of Glenda before my scan. After changing into a delightful blue hospital robe, a walk of approximately 20 paces down the passage to the scanning room where I had to disrobe again - flashing my boobs is becoming a regular occurrence and I guess its only going to happen more frequently as the weeks go on!! Alex and Dom were the radiology technicians assigned to 'map' me today ready for commencement of radiation on Wednesday 20th - after positioning me in the position I'll be required to be in for each session a mould was formed ….. the following information is from BCNA and gives a more accurate description than I could! Careful planning is necessary before radiation treatment can begin. The planning ensures that you get the full benefit of radiation with minimal impact on other parts of your body. During the planning session, a radiation oncologist maps out the breast area that needs treatment. The oncologist or radiation technician uses a special X-ray machine called a simulator, and the process is called simulation because the treatment is being "simulated," or not really given. Because it is so important to position the angles of radiation accurately, the planning session can sometimes last up to an hour. The extra time and care during this session will make your future visits run more smoothly and help you get the most from your radiation therapy. You do not receive any treatment during the planning session. Positioning is extremely important in radiation therapy. Your body will be positioned carefully in order to get the best radiation treatment. You will be in the same position during every treatment, and you will have to remain still. To stabilize your position, you will probably be asked to lie in a special "immobilization device" on the treatment table. You may be asked to lie down in a custom-shaped mold that just touches your back and sides; or your treatment center may use a "breast board" that places your head, arm, and hand in a fixed position. Unfortunately, no padding can be used on the treatment table or positioning devices because that makes your treatment position less precise. Pictures will be taken of the area that needs to be treated. Those images are sent to the radiation planning computer, which will help set up the general treatment fields (the areas that get the radiation). After the simulation is done, the dose of radiation you'll receive is calculated, and your radiation treatment is designed over the next few days. This is called dosimetry. Your radiation oncologist works closely with a radiation dosimetrist, who helps further define the best arrangement and size of your treatment fields and is responsible for making sure you receive the correct amount of radiation. Together they establish the size, shape, and number of the treatment fields. The treatment fields are designed to maximize the dose of radiation to the area that needs to be treated and to avoid or minimize the dose to the normal surrounding tissues. My Princess, Lilly Georgia turned 17 and we celebrated with family dinner at Lakeside - the years are flying by way too fast. Tuesday we left Sale at 8.30 with the LVCH Carers Group for an overnight trip - the weather was quite pleasant when we set off however by the time we stopped in Yarragon for refreshments etc it was raining and the wind was blowing a gale (no refreshments for us) It had been 12 years since we last went on Puffing Billy when we did the tourist 'thing' in the open carriages - today we were treated to the Steam and Cuisine trip, the dining cars had been purchased by the Puffing Billy Historical Society back in the early 60's from the Mount Lyle Railway in Tasmania and named after towns along that railway - Mt Lyell, Double Barril, Rinadeena & Teepookana. The food was beautifully presented and restaurant quality - we both had pork rib eye for mains OMG it was huge but so tender and succulent and dessert was decadence at its best, crumbled chocolate mud cake in an espresso martini jelly, topped with chocolate mousse and Chantilly cream. At the end of the three hour round trip we were off to our overnight accommodation in Kalorama, unfortunately our bus driver hadn't done his homework and was relying on good old Google maps so we did a few laps of the Dandenongs! Our room was not overly large but absolutely spotless and quite comfortable …. dinner … yes more food …. Lamb noisettes for me, salmon for Bill (enjoyable but didn't surpass lunch) tiramisu for dessert. Bill spent a lot of time over dinner reminiscing with another couple who were originally from South Gippsland and whom he had known way back when - in fact he and Beryl had worked together when in their teens. Buffet breakfast on Wednesday morning - yes more food - an excellent selection of hot and cold foods to chose from. Homeward bound (bus driver must have done his homework overnight as we didn't get lost once) with a stop at LVCH in Moe for a talk by Corina on Health matters for seniors, I don't think I have ever been so entertained at an information talk/lecture before, this lady knows her stuff and had us all in fits of laughter (we all received a little gift from her - not sure you'd really want to know what it was!! Last stop on our way home was at Green Olive in Traralgon - oh yes more food ...Chicken Duchess and Mars Bar Cheesecake for me, Seafood platter and Banana Spring Rolls for Bill …. everyone just rolled out to the bus - an amazing couple of days and a welcome break for all carers and those they care for. Thursday was spent recovering from an over load of scrumptious food. Friday had a little bit of 'me' time for a cut and colour. Saturday Heather & I had planned to go to Red Katt for lunch but as it was McHappy Day we changed our mind and supported Ronald McDonald House by having a burger for lunch before going to watch Jack & Shell play tennis - it was the first time they had been in opposition teams playing against each other - Jacks team won, rather proud of my grandson he didn't lose a service game all day. Today the weather is still chilly though the sun is finally shining - supposedly going to warm up as the week progresses.

GOOD THINGS COME IN SMALL PARCELS ....

Wednesday 6 November Good things come in small parcels so the saying goes … and for us this is true with our beautiful daughter-in-law Shell. These days everyone seems so busy with their lives that we don't get to spend that quality time with our loved ones that we should - so when an opportunity arises we grab it with both hands! My appointment with Louise Nardone was scheduled for 11.20 and Shell offered to be my support person and drive us to Traralgon - 45 minutes in the car gave us a chance to have a natter and a few laughs. A couple of forms to fill out (isn't there always!) - the waiting area for radiation at LVRH is quite pleasant, well lit with nice comfy couches and chairs, tea and coffee making facilities, the obligatory jig saw puzzle sitting waiting to be completed and a delightful hospitality worker Brenda who is always on for a chat, knows and remembers patients and family/support persons and who has been happily doing this for over 20 years. Brenda starts discussing climate change with us … when a male voice calls 'Valerie', he introduces himself as Christian - I tell him he doesn't look like Louise! Then I remember I hadn't been available for Robyns initial appointment with Louise and she told me she had seen Christian and said something similar to him - yes my beautiful friend is watching over me and putting words in my mouth!! Thankfully my memory isn't too bad (yet) as the questions Christian had to ask required me delve way back - almost 60 years back … what age did you start menstruating, how many children do you have, did you breast feed, what age did you reach menopause, how long did you take HRT, Shell learnt lots about her mother-in-law today …. all questions that may be helpful with research into breast cancer, its causes and relationship to lifestyle and health as we progress through life, I was finding it hard to concentrate on this handsome young Dr as he had an Essendon Football Club membership lanyard round his neck and I kept thinking of the absolute drubbing the Bulldogs gave them … and yes it got the better of me I just had to ask if he'd been at that game - yes unfortunately was his reply …. big grin on my face as I told him I was a Bulldog fan. I'm not sure what question Christian asked that brought on my tears - Shell explained that I'd had a really traumatic time recently … and as quick as the tears came they stopped. (I understand we grieve because we have loved … but I'd prefer to not cry in public so often!) After an examination to ensure my wounds were completely healed and ready for radiation he left the room to get Louise - I thought Louise would have been advised Robyn had passed but she didn't know until Christian told her … Louise delivered the good news - I would have the three week course, 15 sessions of more intensive treatment …. woohoo that's 10 days less of travelling to Traralgon daily. Normally I would have had the planning CT done after this consultation but the CT machine was out of action (overworked probably and unfortunately) so I'd need to come back either Friday or Monday for this. An enjoyable lunch in the hospital cafeteria (lamb roast for $7 was delicious) before heading home - discussion on the way home was centered around my question answers, information that may be helpful or necessary for Lilly in the future. Heather and I had only discussed menopause yesterday and the fact I'd had endometriosis at age 34 which resulted in a total hysterectomy and early menopause therefore she has no maternal gauge as to what she's experiencing. Another positive from this negative is that information regarding family health has been shared - I'd not thought previously about the fact that this information may be of importance to my beautiful Princess and any daughters she may have in the future. Not many of my family and friends are shorter than me … however the honour of being the shortest in our family goes to Shell … love my beautiful English DIL