NO WONDER PATHOLOGY MAKES ME NERVOUS ...

The past few days I've felt calm, sure there are times when I think about tomorrow and the removal of 'Dotty' but on the whole its not something I've been dwelling on as I've kept busy cooking and making meals for the coming weeks. Saturday was hard when I had to get my acrylic nails removed - I so loved those nails - my nails now look disgusting, short, thin and peeling - I'm rubbing tea tree oil in constantly (as recommended by a friend) hoping to strengthen them. Caught up for coffee with my beautiful foster daughter Lindie who has just returned from holidaying in the US, watched parts of the AFL Grand Final thankfully GWS got a flogging. Sunday was mother/daughter time again, after Devonshire tea went clothes shopping with Heather. A visit from Julie & Tony brightened the afternoon. Monday lazed around catching up on a bit of TV then walked up to Margs - a 4km round trip, was really pleased with this. Today I had to have blood tests ready for tomorrow, the request slip I received was for Dorevitch Pathology so I went there - normally I go to Clinical Labs at Inglis Medical Centre - wish I hadn't. There was a long queue when we got there and two pathologists on duty, I took one look at the male and said to Bill 'hope I don't get him' - yep you guessed it I did - now there was nothing wrong with his manner, he was quite a pleasant man but not competent in taking blood from someone with 'scared' veins so after three failed attempts he had to call for assistance, by this time I was in tears, (memories of 1972 came flooding back when I'd had a similar problem after an operation and in desperation Dr Barry the anaethesetist was called in and he used a vein in my ankle) Pearl came in and in one second flat she had a vein and blood ..yes I had drunk lots of water to plump up my veins … in future I'll only every go to Inglis Street. Bill 'shouted' Macca's for breakfast and we were attended to by a delightful young lady Akanna who brightened my day with her big smile and friendly customer service skills. Lunch outside enjoying the beautiful spring sunshine. Time now to pack my overnight bag and re-read my hospital instructions.

POSITIVE VIBES

Three hours of pre-admission tests and interviews yesterday. A huge thank you to my bestie who made the trip from Warragul to be with me and took 7 pages of notes! A very special friend indeed. My anaesthetist is female and who spent a copious amount of time discussing with me my past history - 39 years since my last operation when my recovery time was long - hence to date this has been my biggest fear about the removal of 'Dotty' - being put to sleep. I left her office feeling much more at ease and pleased she will be on 'my team'. A quick chat with a Dr regarding medications and painkillers - why do the medical profession find it so hard to believe I'm on no prescribed, over the counter or alternative medications. Glenda the admissions nurse I saw was very informative, ensuring I fully understood the procedure I'm about to have, my recovery, including a demonstration on how to put on those sexy long white pressure socks!! My blood pressure was a little high however this was possibly due to anxiety and the fact my arm was straight not relaxed - but nothing to worry about. An ECG showed no heart irregularities ... by now we were in dire need of a caffeine fix and some lunch. A chest Xray still to be done in the next few days and blood tests on Tuesday. Had a few errands that needed doing so I called in and had my Xray done - Heather's friend Theresa was the radiographer - another feel-good appointment - there's just something about a big heartfelt hug. Apologies to the two guys in the waiting room. Slowly managing to read through the BCNA My Journey (also an on-line application available now - probably more convenient but I prefer the hard copy) so much information and personal stories. Another night of broken sleep ....

3AM TEA, CRUMPETS AND MOVIES

So I now have a date for my surgery - Wednesday, October 2nd (yes 2 days before my 73rd birthday). The visit to my surgeon yesterday was a little confronting, even though I'd been through all the details the day prior with my breast cancer nurse. This was the first time I'd seen my mammograms and exactly where 'Dotty' has sited herself - even though 13mm in size 'she' cannot be felt by manual examination, nor can the other 10mm lump, which is benign, (this was only picked up by ultrasound) - I just cannot express enough the importance of regular self-checks, annual Dr examinations and mammograms every two years. Not a tear in sight whilst at the surgeons - proud of me! A beautiful message from Rachel & Kristen had me in tears Just sending a message to say we love you both so very much and we are sorry we won't be able to catch up this weekend. And I know you'll get through it and come through the other side because our family is made of tough stuff (just like those Bulldogs of yours). Sleep avoided me during the night and after lying there with morbid thoughts going round and round in my head I got up around 3am made a cup of Camomile, Vanilla & Honey tea and a buttered crumpet and settled down on the couch snuggled under my Bulldogs rug and watched a movie - went back to bed around 5.30 and slept until 7.15 Bill was already up and preparing breakfast. A phonecall from Di, Admissions Clerk at the Hospital with 4 appointments for tomorrow starting at 10.30 - the anesthetist, pre-admissions nurse, ECG, Blood tests, XRay, and hospital Doctor - my bestie Jan is coming up to go with me. A little bit of 'me time' and pampering with a haircut from Sarah at Zienna Hair .... next step will be a pedicure whilst I have my beautiful pink and floral fingernails removed unfortunately

WHAT A LEGACY - JANE MCRATH

It's a week now since my diagnosis .... Wednesday was a tough day - the emotions were up and down all day - Marg Centra our local McGrath Breast Cancer Nurse rang to establish contact and make an appointment to go over what I can expect and offer support, I was just not ready to talk then I still needed time to digest the diagnosis and what lies ahead. Family and friends called in or rang as the news spread - feeling very blessed - I'm going to have an amazing support group around me. I've named my offending lump 'Dotty' Thursday was a beautiful sunny warm day and I woke feeling quite calm and serene - Sale Cancer Support Group meets on the third Thursday of each month and today was at the Greyhound Club where we enjoyed a lovely meal sitting outdoors trackside. I was able to say 'I have been diagnosed with Breast Cancer' without shedding one tear - GO ME! Mikayla sent me a lovely message via Messenger which did make the tears well, not sad tears but humble tears Wanted you to know that I’m thinking of you at this time You’re one of the most incredibly tough women I’ve had the pleasure of coming across and I’m so lucky to have an extra grandma like you Dylan rang and we spoke for 40 minutes, he'd previously sent me a message, just a simple love you grandma on Wednesday. I'm so so lucky to have such caring grandkids. Went to see The Sapphires (stage version) at The Wedge with Noelene on Friday night ... I also surprised myself by being early to pick Noelene up, well I would have been if I'd not sat for 5 minutes outside her place only to find I was in the wrong street!! now while I was doing this Noelene was outside her place and a car pulled up next door and she went to get into the car when a man alighted the car ... there's more in our comedy of errors - we were enjoying a leisurely glass of Moscato when Noelene decided her feet were thirsty ... the show was great though and certainly a great distraction from all the dramas of recent times. Saturday I set myself the task of cleaning up my desk and finishing a few tasks that had been in the 'too hard basket' including cleaning up my emails. Bursting with enthusiasm and energy on Sunday morning I went for an early morning walk, just a quick 1.5km round the local streets - it was lonely without my 'buddy' but I'm sure she was walking it with me. Coffee and cake with Heather, we'd planned to go to Macca's for the raspberry and custard tart, but every second person in Sale must have been at Maccas so we went to the Centre Bakery. Robyn and I had been waiting for the Dowton Abbey movie so Sunday I went with Pat & Geoff. What a brilliant movie. Both Friday night and Sunday I had a spare seat next to me - coincidence or was Robyn there in spirit. Yesterday was Carers Support Group meeting, a lovely group of ladies and just one male. I'd not really considered support groups and their worth previously but I've gained so much knowledge and made new friends plus the added bonus of yummy morning teas provided by Alison and Elaine from LVCH. Feeling much stronger emotionally I'd made an appointment to visit Marg Centra. What a legacy Jane McGrath has left - these Breast Cancer Nurses are so encouraging, supportive, informative and caring and overworked. Marg went through what to expect with my surgery, step by step, in simple language and diagrams so easy to understand and absorb. I was fitted for a free bra - one suitable to wear after surgery and during treatment and given $100 cash to treat myself to something nice or enjoy a romantic dinner with Bill, to spend on whatever buoyed me up/gave me pleasure. (We've decided to have a night in Melbourne when radiation is finished) plus a $100 voucher for Coles Express for petrol to help with transport costs - all through the generosity of the local community. I came home feeling confident, the chances of my cancer returning are 5% ... due to the type and early diagnosis - I urge every woman to have regular mammograms. Exercise and diet are going to be important with recovery so I've been walking the past few mornings, with my earbuds in - amazing how music puts an extra bounce in your step - gradually increasing the distance. Who knows 'Dotty' could just be the catalyst I needed to become a slimmer, fitter personl. Today my emotions are roller coasting, upbeat and happy to miserable and teary again ... maybe its due to the fact I've an appointment with my surgeon later today and the operation to remove 'Dotty' is getting closer.

EVEN GRANDMAS GET BREAST CANCER ...

We all have a journey to travel … No two journeys are the same … This is my journey … But where did it begin … I guess it began back in June this year when I received an email from Breastscreen reminding me my bi-annual mammogram was due Two years ago I'd thought I'd had my last mammogram as I was over 70 which I thought was the cut off point, now I discover that reminders are sent until age 74 and then its over to you to continue if you wish … memories of mammograms gone by flashed back not really pleasant memories but not really painful memories either - having dense boobs had always meant suffering discomfort as they were squashed this way and that way … was it really necessary to go through this again … Being a Libran I tend to take a long time deciding, will I? won't I? I consult my diary and find the first suitable date available and book on-line (so convenient) for Tuesday 13 August - I reason that will be easy just pop in on my way to the pool for my hydro exercise group, will be in my swimmers under my tracksuit so that means less hassle getting undressed and dressed again -after all it is winter in Sale. No-one in the waiting area … so I'm attended to immediately … there seems to be a problem scanning my right boob, there's a crease in the image I'm told, second take is good so I'm told. Life continues on … the following week Bill (my beloved hubby) needs hospitalisation due to pneumonia, my brother loses his six and a half year battle with mesothelioma and Robyn one of my besties who is suffering metastatic breast cancer has been taken to hospital in Melbourne. Amidst making arrangements for Bills siblings to come and care for him whilst I fly to Qld to be with my sister-in-law and attend my brothers funeral, I get a phone call from Breastscreen Traralgon informing me I need to attend for a re-screen as there is a difference showing up in my recent mammogram compared to my previous one … now those who know me well know I'm a highly emotional person at the best of times, I tear up at the drop of a hat, I've even been known to cry watching Home & Away!! … up till then I'd been holding things together pretty well I thought, but this phone call 'threw me for six' amidst my blubbering we arranged an appointment for Tuesday 10 September. I ring one of my other 'besties' Elaine who calms me down - immediately saying 'I'll take you and be your support but remember positive thinking, its probably just a bad scan'. My week on the Gold Coast was pleasant, Pete's funeral was an amazing tribute to his life (67 still too young though) - caught up with all the family, those big welcoming hugs from our great grandies was so heartwarming, spent an afternoon in Brisbane with my eldest grandson and very special sister-in-law moments with Carol. Sale hospital rang me to say Robyn was back from Melbourne and was looking forward to visitors. On my arrival home I rang Robyn and her daughter answered advising me Robyn wasn't expected to last the weekend … far out fruitloops! life just keeps on delivering curved balls … I was able to spend several hours next day with my beautiful, brave friend for whom I'd been a support the past three years the one who had encouraged me to try new adventures, who shared the same passions, who'd shown courage in the face of adversity, we'd laughed, goofed about, walked, talked and now at age 58 was about to be re-united with her Dad. On Sunday September 8 at 3.38am I received a call from Sale Hospital advising me Robyn had passed - she'd named me as her second next of kin. I felt so humble and so numb - RIP beautiful friend. I remember saying FU CANCER Monday 9th was Bills 83rd birthday and I'd planned a trip to Melbourne to experience The Rain Room which was here for a short season and fully booked out however due to the freezing weather and him still coughing we had to cancel … Surely life must start providing us with lemonade and not lemons soon. Tuesday 10th off to Traralgon - so positive nothing would show in my re-screen …. Wrong again!!!! Mammogram first, followed by ultrasound, followed by consult with Dr Pav and nurse/counsellor Lee who informed me two small lumps had been discovered - OMG the floodgates opened but not for long as the tissue box only contained one tissue!! Somehow I explained this was just the final straw to what had been a 'shitty' month (please excuse language but how else do you describe it) they then explained to me what the next steps were … firstly a fine needle aspiration which is to draw cells from the offending lumps (in a later blog I'll detail what each of these procedures entail) unfortunately this was unsuccessful, I was then examined physically by Dr Chan who could not find any lumps or swelling in lymph nodes which meant I now faced a core biopsy under local anesthetic on each lump - I felt more discomfort lying with my arm above my head as this was the shoulder I'd torn the long ligament in last year and still was unable to stretch fully - another nurse Emma held my hand and chatted to me - telling me how strong I was … these three amazingly kind caring and compassionate ladies did all they could to make the procedures as pleasant and pain free as possible - two markers were inserted to show in future procedures or mammograms. The wounds were dressed and a further gentle mammogram performed. Results of biopsies would be known next Tuesday and a further appointment was made. How better to digest this news than with a yummy lunch at Eviva Italian restaurant! Telling Bill was not easy - we've been down the cancer journey with him in the past - telling the 'girls' was relatively easy yet talking about my boobs to my son Rob was not something I felt comfortable with luckily I have an amazing daughter in law who was able to tell him. Getting through Robyns funeral was hard - although I kept telling myself my lumps would be benign I couldn't help wonder what lay in store for me if I was wrong. The weekend flew by with a birthday luncheon for a friends 80th on Saturday and family dinner on Sunday evening. Whilst I was calm and positive Bill was really edgy and I wondered if he felt the need to come with me on Tuesday - he said no but he was restless on Monday night and neither of us had much quality sleep. Tuesday - a cool but fine sunny morning Elaine picked me up and we were both upbeat and positive, planning what we were going to do after my appointment - Elaine came into the consulting room where Breast nurse/counsellor Ges explained what would take place in that Dr Tan would come in and speak to me about the biopsy results - still feeling positive - not expecting the 'Libran effect' one negative and one positive lump, even my boobs can't make up their mind - would the results have been so upsetting if I'd not been so positive in my thinking, deflated, shocked, sobbing, disbelief, annoyance yet not anger all these emotions came spilling out - Elaine was visibly shaken as well. Dr Tan went on to explain the offending lump and some surrounding tissue will be removed including a central lymph node, this will be done under general anesthetic usually in a day procedure then around 3-6 weeks later between 15-25 sessions of radiation therapy followed by a hormone blocker Tamoxifen for some years. Dr Tan made an appointment for us to see our GP at 4pm. One positive is I'm now relinquished from Breastscreen - no more mammograms (happy dance) ongoing care will be by my GP, surgeon, oncologist etc. I'm not sure but I think both Elaine and I said the F word several times once we were out of the building … no shopping today … I just needed to get home and tell Bill - however we did stop at Rosedale bakery for coffee and cream bun - yeah that helped. Elaine offered to go and talk to Heather & Shell … giving Bill and I time to digest the news - although we'd heard the C word several times before it still manages to take the wind out of ones sails. Heather rang saying she was now in charge and would be with me every step of my journey. As I'd had several best wishes/thinking of you today messages we decided to go to the pool and meet up with our wonderful hydro friends and tell them in person over coffee and hot chips. Heather drove us to the medical centre and sat in on the discussions with Bruce (Johnston our GP) - next step to gain an early appointment with Mr Paul Strauss the surgeon who has removed several skin cancers for Bill and in whom we have great trust. Coffee with Rob to brief him on what is going to happen .. home for dinner and lose ourselves watching TV before bed. Wide awake at 3am .. so many thoughts running through my head … keeping a journal whilst Bill was at Peter Mac from operation till end of radiation was so therapeutic for me hence I got up at 5am to begin 'blogging' My Journey in a hope that my musings may in some way help other women particularly older women in the future …. I plan to make a 'hard copy' also where I can add some personal touches …. I am truly blessed to have a wonderful support team in family and friends led by my children. My goal has been and still is to live past 90 years and 6 weeks … the age my darling Mumma was when we lost her. I still have so much living to do …. this 13mm little sucker isn't going to beat me -

THE JOYS OF BEING A GRANDPARENT

Being a Grandparent is one of the greatest joys in life .... we are fortunate to have 13 grandchildren plus three 'surrogate/foster' granddaughters and four 'surrogate/foster' greatgrandies ...



Nowadays, many families live far away from their grandparents, or parents have children later in life and the grandparents are either too old to help with raising the children or have already passed away. Therefore, an additional attachment figure for the children as well as support for the parents, is missing. Parents notice this particularly when they have difficulty finding the time between their jobs and household duties to take care of their children in the loving and patient way they would like. But there is a solution: finding a surrogate grandparent. 

A new organisation has emerged which links 'surrogate' Grandparents and families .....www.findagrandparent.org.au.  There is no charge for Grandparents registering however you are required to go through the National Police Check to be approved - for families there is a small fee, but the rewards would definitely outweigh the cost. 

QSkin Survey

I recently received an invitation to participate in the Q Skin Study .... what is the Q Skin Study you might ask - well its the largest medical research study every conducted in Queensland.  The Q Skin Study needs Queenslanders aged between 40 and 69 years from all backgrounds to take part.  A very large study group is needed to be able to find the rarer causes of skin cancer and to be sure that the findings apply to as many people as possible.

What do you need to do .... just visit www.Qskin.qimr.edu.au and fill in the survey form and two consent forms .... doesn't take long 15-20 mins .... lets all do what we can to prevent and cure melanoma and skin cancer.